Rant: Don't Read If You're Faint of Heart

     I don't usually have personal drama because after knowing what nutjobs most people are I limit my interaction with strangers in my personal life, outside of work and school that is. And am happier for it.
     But today, I noticed that all four of the hubcaps are missing off my car. They were there about two weeks ago when my dad helped me top up the tire pressure. Since I hate driving, I have maybe driven only twice since then. I quickly secured up the locks on the rabbits in the backyard.
     I don't understand why I am such a target. Is it because I live alone? Are my neighbors jealous because I have central air? Is it all crazy exes that I've dumped because they haven't treated me well? I did swear off former military guys and firefighters because they are all crazy and treat women like shit. I don't feel like I am beautiful or smart enough to make another woman so jealous as to do something like this, but anything is possible. I have a big mouth, maybe I upset someone? Maybe someone hates paramedical practitioners? I'm not working at the moment. Are people jealous of my amazing garden? How can they see it beneath all that grass?
     I seriously doubt someone stole them for their own use. My tires are ridiculously small and flimsy, they have to be special ordered from the tire store because they sams and walmart don't carry them. The hubcaps, are, of course, correspondingly tiny.
    I was just teased about the new clothesline, that someone might come up and steal my laundry from my carport. I laughed it off. Sure, that person should probably be the first one I suspect, but he would have nothing to gain from vandalizing me.
     So, WTF? FML.

Girl Builds Pond, Part One


Benefits vs. Arguments for Guerrilla Gardening

     Guerilla gardening is in full swing during the warmer months all across the United States. Likely a reaction to cooped-up urbanites retaliation against metropolitan space waste, guerrilla gardeners plant flowers and vegetables in areas that are otherwise laying fallow or abandoned.
     Some people aren't happy with guerrilla gardeners. Recently in Washington DC, the city removed hundreds of red, white, and blue flowering plants that had been placed by a guerrilla gardener on a sloping embankment, claiming that his climbing could lead to falling, which would incur liability for the taxpayers. They also claimed that there was no money in their budget for the upkeep of the plantings.
     Another recent article in the New York Times paints urban guerrilla gardeners in a negative light by supposing that a landscape of nothing but edibles will be a landscape without pollinators. This, of course, is untrue. I also emailed the author, Mariellé Anzelone, about her error concerning sassafrass. Her solution is not to avoid planting up the urban landscape, but to plant native wildflowers to promote diverse pollinators.
   "Urban activists should celebrate the indigenous wildflowers that sustain our pollinators beyond the short life span of fruit tree blossoms. In addition, we should incorporate native edibles into the planting palette. Blueberries, Juneberries and beach plums feed more species than just us humans."
     Anzelone and I agree on one thing, which is that native plants should be incorporated into any plan for regreening an urban zone. All too often city planners try to beautify by planting non-useful non-natives, like crepe myrtle and oleander. WE, the citizens, should be greening with natives and edibles like oak trees and others that were once found here in a time before pretty little homes.
     She neglects to point out that done properly, a neighborhood or area planted with nothing but edibles would still attract pollinators because the garden planners would want great diversity in their plantings. Anyone with a bit of gardening knowledge knows to plant more than one type of vegetable, or a time will come when you will be hungry. Does she think guerrilla gardeners are greening their cities with nothing but Irish potatoes, the nation's most popular vegetable? Or nothing but red delicious apples?
     As any permie can tell you, diversity in plantings is what promotes resistance to disease and pests. Planting a good deal of wildflowers will bring in butterflies and bees, but also bring in caterpillars and grasshoppers. You have to pick and choose your battles, and better to have a wide variety of edible or useful plantings than a lot of space wasted on toxics that attract plant-eaters. With the internet making distant knowledge available, and international shipping being how it is, there is no reason every abandoned easement can't be planted with useful edibles, or native edibles, or just native plants. Sweet potatoes from Japan, climbing beans from Germany, sugarcane from the Dominican Republic, the possibilities are endless. For some ideas for diverse edibles for Florida, check out my site and this site.
     For example, a maple tree might be useful in several ways, and is native. Native cottage roses are the same way. Both can be edible to humans and urban livestock and provide beauty. Roses attract pollinators. Maples provide shade and windbreaks, and can provide firewood. Almost any plant can be rated according to some simple points like these, and as long as plantings remain diverse, urban gardeners will do well with it.

     Eight Points for Identifying Useful Plants

     Edible to humans
     Edible to urban livestock
     Edible to urban wildlife
     Attract pollinators
     Provide beauty
     Provide shade and windbreaks
     Provide textiles or firewood for humans
     Provide habitat for urban animals

Bamboo

Native to: Asia.  Uses: Edible, Forage, Xeriscaping, Fencing, Fuel, Building Material, Clothing Textile.
     I love bamboo. It's got a very tropical, Asian feel to it, indeed, it is the definition plant for Japanese-style gardens. It grows very quickly thanks to it's unique rhizomial adaptations. It has a million and one uses. And rabbits love it.
     I think most people should understand before they plant bamboo that it is a giant grass. And think of how hard it is to get rid of grass in Florida once it is established! So extreme care should be taken before a planting of bamboo is placed anywhere. It should probably not be planted over sewer lines, electrical lines, water pipes, etc.
Solve-It Saturday Linkup     My large bamboo is in a pot, while my dwarf bamboo hides underneath a palmetto bush. Hopefully that will be good enough to keep my yard safe.
     This pile of bamboo was laying by the curb at a neighbor's house. Silly people.

Covert Urban Homesteading, Part 2: Animals


   Without animals, your urban homestead is really just a super-nice garden. To really maximize your land use, you will want to get some small herbivores to convert your kitchen waste and yard refuse into instant fertilizer and protein. It should be noted that since you have a homestead here, and not an urban farm, you should be trying to provide as much of your animal feed as possible yourself. Buying feed is not what homesteaders do, it's what urbanites do, right?
     Every one of these animals will need their human caregivers to protect them from human and animal threats in addition to providing quality feed and water, and a clean living environment. Urban homesteaders here in Florida will have numerous pests such as weasels, hawks, cranes, cats, dogs, snakes, raccoons, teenagers, homeless, and the odd code enforcement official to contend with.

     Rabbits are by far my favorite outside animal. They can live on a completely home-grown diet of grasses and weeds, or planted vegetation. Larger operations will probably appreciate he convenience of pellet, which is not prohibitively expensive. The meat and manure are high quality, and extra stock can be sold as pets.

     Chickens are hilarious little birds. I've read that a combination of cat food and day-old bread, supplemented with egg shells, can be enough food for them, though I've never tried it.

     Quail need an extremely high protein diet as naturally they would eat nothing but insects. I've heard that they thrive in areas high in cockroaches, so...

     Guinea Pigs, also called cuys, are good eats in parts of South America. Think of them as slightly smaller rabbits.

     Mice/Hamsters. I'm considering raising them just for their cat and dog food value, since they will eat rabbit pellet and kitchen scraps and be fine with that. Maybe ground hamster could become the next big chicken or fish feed additive?

     Pigeons, especially homing pigeons, are popular outdoor pets in West Florida. I've heard that they can free-range and return home very well. They eat similar feed as chickens.

Menagerie Monday Linkup     Fish can be kept in aquariums as pets, raised for meat value, or raised for their plant fertilization value (think Aquaponics). Crawdads, catfish, and tilapia are all raised successfully here in Florida. Perhaps one of the most covert urban animal operations could involve a decorative "koi" pond filled with catfish or tilapia (Guess what I'm building in my back yard!).

     Bees live very well here in Florida, the main consideration being the location and disguise of your hive(s). After all, no one can complain you have bees if they can't see the hives. Most urban and suburban areas of Florida have decorative flowering plants and trees, that produce year-round blooms.